How can you not love Frankenhooker? It’s a timeless story. Boy loves girl, girl is horribly mutilated by a rampaging lawnmower, boy uses cash and super charged crack to solicit prostitutes who explode and provide him with the necessary appendages to put his girlfriend back together.
What originally attracted me to Frankenhooker (other than the title and premise, of course) was the VHS box that featured a button you could push to hear the patchwork prostitute yell “WANNA DATE?” loudly throughout Blockbuster Video. I’m not sure what marketing genius came up with the idea for the box, but he or she should have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame because the whole packaging of that film was tantalizing for any horror fan strolling the aisles at the video store.
Director Frank Henenlotter never gets the credit he deserves for Frankenhooker, possibly because he’d already had two horror classics under his belt (Basket Case and Brain Damage) prior to making it. But, Frankenhooker is a total delight with off kilter performances by James Lorinz (who, as mad doctor Jeffrey, resembles a DNA splicing experiment gone awry with samples from Andrew McCarthy, Dana Carvey, and Dennis Miller included in that soup) and Patty Mullen (1987’s Penthouse Pet of the Year) as Elizabeth, his doomed girlfriend who shows off some great comedic chops as she wanders the streets as the titular creature.
Frankenhooker hearkens back to that wonderful time in the 80s and 90s when you could stumble upon gems like this just by perusing the shelves at national chain Blockbuster or a local video dealer. Yes, we now have Netflix, Amazon, Hulu and other internet options where almost anything we desire is at our fingertips. It’s just not the same, though. Nothing can replace the glee of pushing that button repeatedly, reaching behind the box for the plastic case containing that VHS tape, and toting it around until you checked out and rushed home to watch it.
If it’s been a while since you’ve seen Frankenhooker, be kind, rewind 25 years, and give this black comedy horror classic another look on whatever medium you find it on now.
Frankenhooker grade: B+
This Old Haunted House 